Prude

Sometimes I feel lonelier at work when I am surrounded by tons and tons of people than I feel at home by myself. Because its always better to be sad because you have nobody to talk to in an empty room than to be sad that you have nobody to talk to when you are standing around with 8 other waiters.

Its not that I am an outcast at work or anything. Plenty of people talk to me and like me and everything. I just get left behind in conversations easily. I'm not a merciless flirt like some of the people at the restaurant which is one huge reason that I am always on the outskirts of the socializing. But I am also just quiet sometimes. However, the main problem is that everyone has this idea of what kind of person I am, and its just not me.

They all think that I am so innocent and naive. And I don't care what you say, being called naive is not a compliment. My friends have tried to convince me of this during many conversations with me bitching about being called naive again. But being called naive is ALWAYS bad. Little sisters are naive, not friends, and not even less-than-friends. Just because I am a nice person and a loyal girlfriend and I don't constantly talk about my escapades in bed, it doesn't mean that I am socially ignorant or unable to understand sexual innuendo.

Tonight the head waiter was talking about gay sex or something or other....he's always hitting on the college-age guy waiters so I'm sure it had to do with getting into one of their pairs of black standard-issue pants. And out of nowhere he goes "Ohhh, look at Phoebe, she can't understand anything we're talking about. You know I can never picture her ever doing anything sexual." Okay, so there is no way that I would ever want him to be picturing me doing anything remotely sexual....but still. Why does everyone think that I am such a freaking prude? I don't drop my pants constantly, but I'm not 7 years old.

The only person who keeps me sane at work is Paul. And I'm not even using a code name there. But don't worry, Ed Murray won't be able to track him down and blackmail him for my identity because Paul is not his first name.