Pole Dancers For Peace

I am unleashing my unabashed liberal views on the streets of Baltimore. When mi madre let me know that we would be participating in a peace stand on 9/11, I thought it would be vigil-like and, well, boring. Fortunately, it turned out to be more along the lines of yelling at passing cars from a busy intersection along which a gaggle of peace protesters were gathered. People were supposedly gathered all along N. Charles throughout the city, but I am sure that nobody was as entertaining in their peacefulness as my mother, sister and me.

I couldn't be as original in my poster-making as I wanted to be...my mother kabashed the 'Pole Dancers for Peace' idea before it even got on paper--I wasn't going to actually pole dance, just lean seductively against the telephone pole. I was similarly disallowed from promoting Barack because peace is apparently non-partisan according to the Baltimore Women in Black who coordinated the 'peace path.' My anti-Baltimore mayoral candidate (who shall remain nameless so that I don't get cussed out by crazy politicians on this blog again) slogan, "Another day, another death, Vote ____ _____ for Mayor and uphold the 'peace'" was also disqualified by my discerning mother. However, due to my undaunted creative genius, I was able to pull together a Chicago outfit (cubs hat and CHICAGO shirt), that was supposed to be an implied plug for Obama when combined with my 'Vote for Peace in 2008' sign. Only one person really got the message as far as I know, but a lot of people honked for peace in general.

Also, I should note that I am actually terrified of my lump-under-the-arm-removal surgery. I haven't been sleeping well because I'm scared of dying of cancer. The doctor didn't tell me straight out that she thought there was any chance that it was cancerous, but she did say that the general surgeon would want to take it out and biopsy it. I'm not stupid, I know what biopsy means. It means, see if it is cancer and if it is there is a good chance you will be checking out of this world just like Olive did. Maybe unlikely, but I am a hypochondriac and am particularly paranoid ever since the aforementioned checking out of Olive, and the past few weeks of "maybe you have lupis...maybe not...but your blood results do show markers of an auto-immune disease." Pssht. Whatever.

I'm in pretty good spirits right now anyway because I got the ass-kickingest 80's slash 90's sweatshirt today, aaaand I just found out that Amanda Bynes has a new movie coming out. Score.


"I'm a hustler, I'm a, I'm a huster."
-Mi hermanita y yo every time we see one of the Hustler golf carts rolling around Baltimore to take YOU and YOUR FRIENDS to the nearest Hustler Club.